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If you're reading this...

It shows you still check up on me to see how I am if I am ok...
If not its just pointless words put together pointlessly.
All i wanted you to do is care about me is to for me how I cared about you.
When I said for you to never talk to me again all you had to say was "lol. ok" you didn't even fight for me? Don't you miss me?
People tell me to be strong and show no emotion, but truth be told I was completely and uttley inlove with you. And that makes me think weren't you inlove with me to not care back for me? Am i just this stupid little girl who fell for you that you didn't give 2 fucks about?
I'm hurting so bad and i'm trying to not let it get to me but I am lying to my self. It sucks you're still all I ever think about and writting this I still can't help but cry despite how much I try and hold it back. I am pouring my heart out whatever is left of it anyways and Im not even sure if you will read this, knowing my luck while writing this you're out fucking some other girl and the thought is killing me.
Did you not mean it when you said you wanted to marry me?
Did you not mean it when you said you wanted to have a future with me? With bubbies, pugs, just basically a fucking zoo? All the nice cars and a nice home to take bubbies out to play soccer on the weekends? Was it all just a sick fucking joke to play with my head?
I thought you would love me forever...
You'll never be able to find someone like me to tell how big your poos were, to pick gross stuff on each other, to fall asleep with, fuck to not even shave and give a fuck no matter what i still loved you.
And you don't even want me and im just so fucking pathetic so fucking pathetic even writting this!
Don't you miss sunday drives?
I thought you would miss me, but obviously you must of not love me that much to not even care just to throw me away.
Doesn't everything remind you of me?
Don't you miss me don't you even fucking care?
I guess not.

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November 2009
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